14 posts tagged “recommended”

longing is the core of mystery.
longing itself brings the cure.
the only rule is, suffer the pain.

your desire must be disciplined,
and what you want to happen
in time, sacrificed.

- rumi

I was out and about and decided to to check up on what was playing at the Lumiere which is only a block away from me. One of the posters that caught my eye was A Jihad for Love which is a documentary that chronicles the lives of various muslims who struggle to reconcile their faith and sexuality. The stories were powerful and heartbreaking in many instances. People have been forced to flee their countries because of persecution and end up in countries that don't want them and struggle to find acceptance somewhere. It's also a stark reminder of although in the west many homosexuals struggle with society they aren't pushed to the point they have to flee or go into hiding. We're still very far away from a truly open society where people are free to be themselves. The director and co-producer were also there to answer questions which was an added bonus.

The biggest struggle for many of the people the in the documentary is for them to come to terms with who they are because on the face of it Islam is quite explicit of how it perceives homosexuality. One of the people featured is an openly gay imam from south africa who has reconciled his faith and sexuality and has attempted to create a bridge between himself and standard conservative clergy. I think his views are received more easily by other followers than the established orthodoxy. The other big problem he faces is that his attempts to reinterpret the specific clauses that seem to indicate that homosexuality is a sin usually fall on deaf ears with other clergy preferring a much more literal interpretation.  The lines in particular that come up mostly have to do with sodom and gomarrah where it talks about male/male intercourse as a sin. Of course you can step back and say what was really the sin was the way the people behaved and not the act itself. I find it sad that it's so easy for people to cherry pick arguments like this for religious texts but often ignore other parts when it doesn't suit them. The very fact that most of the people interviewed had such deep faith was interesting especially since they never consider leaving Islam.

The director also talked about his most interesting case was of a woman named Marayam. He had spent 4 years trying to convince to speak her story. She seemed to be the most conflicted of all. She had been in an abusive marriage and constantly struggled with her feelings for women. Eventually she emailed him and said she was ready to speak in front of camera and introduce her girlfriend whom she had met in egypt. Even though they seem to be deeply in love Maryam kept commenting on how she wished she would be punished because she still sees herself as being a sinner. It really upset me that she is so tortured and the act of finding love brings her so much pain.

This is well worth watching and the directors comments about it raised some interesting perspectives. One of his comments was that the whole LGBT labeling may not apply equally in other cultures and is perhaps mostly a western construct where in other cultures there are more layers than that. I'm curious to find out more about what he really meant which means I'll have to do some research. His comment came after someone brought up Ahmedinjad's comments about there being no homosexuals in Iran. The director pointed out it was a misquote which actually meant  iranian homosexuals aren't like western homosexuals. This seems like a nonsensical statement but in the light of the cultural context both groups find themselves in there might be something to it. It's not easy to define and I'm struggling to find the distinction but that maybe because my perspective is wholly western.

rose, oh pure contradiction, joy
of being no-one's sleep under so many
lids.
- rilke

After seeing Juno I got really interested in learning more about the writer Diablo Cody. The movie was laced with so many cool music references that I knew she was the kind of writer that I could really get into. I also had a similar fascination with Chuck Klosterman and have read all the books he's written. I guess it's just that side of me which finds meaning in music and lyrics and helps me reconcile my perception of reality.

Candy girl isn't about music but music does play a big part in the book because it's all about strippers and what would a strip club be without music? A very poor place indeed *giggle*. Diablo stumbled into the world of stripping based on a whim and gives an insiders view of going from a complete neophyte to stripper extraordinaire (well much better than she was when she first started) . The book is quite graphic in places so if you're rather prudish you'd probably want to stay clear. She has an incredible sense of humor and so many of the lines in the book had me laughing out loud (yes LOLzing) and keeps up a frenetic pace as she moves from one strip club to another seeking more adventure. Oh, this all takes place in Minnesota (who would have thunk it).

"I was planning to strip that evening, and I wanted to do it with my fantasy hair. I would snare customers in my golden locks and bind them until they were purple and gasping. Then, I'd grab their wallets and run cackling into the night. Rapunzel the rapist. Fucking right on".

By her own admission she doesn't fit any kind of cliched stripper back story. She came from good home with great parents. Stripping was basically an outlet to counteract the mundane life she was leading. Some people bungee jump for thrills she would dance around a pole for hers. The other side of the story was about the kind of people that would show up providing a view into the full spectrum of human sexuality. Some of the stuff is pretty odd and creepy but every now and then it's good be reminded that everyone evolves a different way including their sexual tastes and appetites. I think it's also a world that fascinates many people because sex is still such a taboo thing in larger society. Although as indicated by another one of my posts the basic concept has seeped into mainstream culture. Perhaps it's a good thing with strippers being able to have a bit of laugh at other peoples expense.

I personally don't have any moral problems with strip clubs and strippers. I tend towards the school of thought that adults should be free to do as they choose as long as they aren't causing harm to others. There is a fine line in the sex worker world and I'm against sexual slavery that some people are forced into which is common in many third world countries. In the context of the story most of the girls it would seem fell into it for quick cash and while not being the best place in the world to work they weren't being forced to do anything.

You maybe wondering if I have a strip club story to tell and given my stance am I an avid patron of such establishments? Yes, I do have story but I'm not a patron. It really comes down to allocation of resources. I'd rather throw my money at things I find personally interesting (books, music, movies - not those kinds of movie, charities) than say a semi-naked woman that feigns interest in my existence. I'm jaded enough to understand this ephemeral bit of attention is probably more repulsive to her than pleasurable and I'd rather not participate. No need to worry though there are more than enough people to take my place and keep all those little green pieces of paper flowing.

Back to the story. A friend of mine decided he wanted to have a wild bachelor's night out before he got married. Never mind the fact that I've never understood why guys want to go to strip clubs before they get married. The whole "one last wild time before I get married" thing seems kind of idiotic. Chances are once they are married they'll go to the strip clubs even more. I had actually never been to a strip club before and here I am walking into this club and the first thing that struck me was the dimmed lighting , cheesy music and lots of ugly guys. The guys I was with were all going wild and as soon as I knew it people were disappearing. Here I am sitting there with my drink trying to think of what music I'd want to listen to in a place like this. The initial thrill of seeing a bunch of semi-naked girls really wears off quickly (at least for me). It's the wholesale nature of it that isn't very attractive. It's like a vegas buffet versus intimate dinner with a friend. For some unknown reason the guys had decided to pay for a lap dance for me knowing this is the last thing in the world I want. This attractive girl comes up to me and says my friends wanted me to go for a private dance. So I wander off to this semi-secluded spot with this girl and she asks me to sit. She gets on my lap and this is gist of the conversation

Girl: Hi my name is candy (i can't remember what her name was)
Me: My name is P
Girl: Don't you feel the electricity tonight
Me: What?
Girl: It feels really sexual here right now
Me: Really?
Girl: Yeah, don't you feel it?
Me: No
Girl: Why not? Don't you think I'm hot?
Me: You're attractive, it's just that I don't really have any interest in a lap dance
Girl: Fine. What do you want to talk about?
Me: How did you find yourself stripping?
Girl: I came from (some unknown town in the mid-west) and I'm in college and need to pay for it.
Me: Oh, what do you study?
Girl: Psychology. I love how humans think. (when are they going to start saying computer science)
Me: Cool. So what do you think of freud vs jung?
Girl: Huh? what?
Me: You haven't studied either freud or jung?
Girl: Um, no I study other things.
Me: Really. Such as?
Girl: Oh. I need to go now. (she walks off and as I walk off I see her pointing at me as she leans over and talks to another girl. no doubt saying what a weirdo i was. maybe i should have indulged her but i wasn't in the mood).

The story doesn't end there. I'm getting really bored and trying to come up with ways to entertain myself. Obviously there are lots of girls milling around looking to make bank for the night and one stops by and settles down on a chair next to me. We start talking about music and I asked her what it would take to get the DJ to play a song I wanted. She said she had a dance coming up on the stage in ten minutes and she was allowed to pick any song. So I whispered a song in her ear and gave her and the DJ an generous tip for indulging me. Ten minutes later as the girl takes the stage suddenly I hear the unmistakable  sounds of the song I whispered in the girl's ear and I see my friends all staring at me.  Are you a little bit curious what the song was? I had to pick something that was the polar opposite of the situation we were in.  Rage against the machine's Killing in the name. Yes, I really am that strange.

Candy Girl: A Year in the Life of an Unlikely Stripper

Diablo Cody

spring lies abandoned.
a ditch the color of dark violet
moves along side me
giving no images back.

the only thing that shines
are some yellow flowers.

i am carried inside
my own shadow like a violin
in its black case.

the only thing i want say
hovers just out of reach
like the family silver
at the pawnbroker's

- april and silence, tomas transtromer

I flew back to San Francisco on Monday morning and I'm still somewhat recovering. While I out for some New Years revelry several people mentioned how much they liked Juno. I'm always a little bit skeptical of other peoples choices in movies. Of course I have immaculate taste in movies bordering on divine :P. I woke up on Tuesday morning in a daze and after becoming myself once again in union square and absorbing as much sun light as possible I found my way to the Metreon to check out Juno. I hadn't actually read anything about it and I was going in completely blind. My only negative reaction was that the theater started to fill and was basically full by the time movie started. Don't these people have anything to do on a holiday? They all need to get a life.

Now I know you're waiting for me to actually get to my non-review of Juno but I have a side story. There was an 8 year old girl sitting next to me. A commercial was playing and they used Led Zeplin's Kashmir as the song. As soon as the girl heard the song she started to sing out aloud to the song and had these dramatic hand movements to go along with the singing. She then turned to her mother and said "I know who plays this, it's led zeplin". She seemed very proud of the fact she knew who they were and I thought it was the coolest thing I heard all day. A young rocker in the making which restores my faith in the youth of today to balance out the army of britney zombies.

Ah yes, Juno. There are some movies I fall instantly in love with from the first scene and Juno is one of them. There is a certain artistic sensibility in the way the writer and director have imagined the world that appeals to me. The characters are  awkward, weird and utterly lovable. The basic gist of the story is Juno gets pregnant after getting it on with Paulie (Michael Cera) and follows how she handles it as suitable high jinks ensues. Juno has some great lines and liberally throws them around, though Paulie gets in on the action too.
 
Juno MacGuff: I think I'm, like, in love with you.
Paulie Bleeker: You mean as friends?
Juno MacGuff: No, I mean, like, for real. 'Cause you're, like, the coolest person I've ever met, and you don't even have to try, you know...
Paulie Bleeker: I try really hard, actually.

I think Michael Cera is going to get type-caste as the super awkward guy in all the movies he does although he has been known to branch out:

It's just one of those movies you leave with a big smile on your face. I had the exact same reaction to Little Miss Sunshine and movies like this are such a welcome change to regular stuff we're forced to put up with.  If you're looking for a fun movie this is a good start to the new year. The soundtrack is also quite awesome and I itunesed it as soon as I got home from the movie.

Time to catch up on sleep :)

To be alone I find it necessary to escape the present - I avoid myself. How could I be alone in the Roman emperor's chamber of mirrors? I seek a garret. The spiders must not be disturbed, nor the floor swept, nor the lumber arranged.

- Henry D  Thoreau ,  first journal entry

I caught Into the Wild with a friend yesterday. I didn't really come into the movie expecting a great deal. The reviews on  IMDB were pretty good. I tend to use IMDB as my guide though it doesn't always get it right. The movie is about Christopher McCandless who gave away all his money after college and went off on an adventure and ended up in Alaska where he eventually died. There's much more to the story with a central theme being all the people he met and touched along the way. I'm not sure how much was done more for theatrical effect versus reality. Although reality has a tendency to be quite a bit more stranger than fiction. There is also a book which probably covers the actual story in more detail which I might be tempted to pick up.

What really resonated with me in the movie is the struggle to go against the norm and discover something from within. So much of life is lived in externalities that doesn't leave a great deal of time for reflection. Christopher's journey doesn't seem like it was one of pure self-discovery but his way of trying to erase his own perceived brutality of a emotionally traumatizing family life. His need for solitude is something I have covered before but seems to be a common theme within the writings of many people. The movie is also a metaphorical journey of the self from city life to Alaska as he withdraws from the external world into his own internal one. His ultimate realization and one which I will not spoil for you is all too true and the revelation seems so obvious but we are often blind to what is right in front of us.

The movie has some beautiful quotes in it that inspired me to seek a few more books. I get really excited when I'm reading something and the author's words penetrate deep into me as if the author is saying "i too have felt what you have felt". It's that bridge of words that vainly attempts to grasp the subjective nature of our being. It is the only path we have that without them we would remain emotional ivory towers forever alone with our feelings.

Tickets for the Rock the Bells go on sale this Saturday. Think of it as Coachella for hip-hop and the line up this year is awesome. I'm really excited and hopefully I get tickets and convince a group of people to go.

Here's my selection

• Rage Against the Machine
• Wu-Tang Clan (I've always wanted to see them live)
• Blackalicious
• Hieroglyphics
  
• Public Enemy (this is going to be wild)
• Cypress Hill
• The Roots
• Pharaohe Monch
• Mos Def

Yup, that's pretty much everyone there. I can't wait till August 18th comes around and I get to see so many groups I have been dying to see for many years.

BTW Type-O-Negative are playing at Slim's on the 18th of April. They're another band I've wanted to see for years and a chance to hang out with the goths ;)

I went into Reign Over Me not quite knowing what to expect. I like Adam Sandler but I think sometimes he gets into this repetitive acting mode where he does this one voice which really annoys me. Lately he's been branching out which is a good thing and I think this has to be his best "serious" movie. The central theme of the movie revolves around Alan (Don Cheadle) bumping into his old college room mate Charlie (Adam Sandler) and discovering how much Charlie's life has fallen apart after his wife and three kids were killed aboard a plane on 9/11. Charlie is a broken man and lives in his own world in order avoid thinking about his family. Alan a frustrated dentist tries to reach Charlie and save him but discovers you can't save someone that doesn't want to be saved. The movie isn't all serious and is full of humor both obvious and dark. The movie is really quirky which I love and as the movie went on I fell in love with it.

The movie tackles the issue post-traumatic stress disorder and how easy it is for a supposedly perfect life to unravel. Another point the movie tries to make is that we get caught in the trivialities of life and often miss the big picture. Alan lives an uninteresting life and is the nice guy that always gets kicked around. In Charlie he finds someone who can help him discover himself again. It's a non-linear symbiotic relationship that works in beautiful way. I know a movie is good when it can move me to tears. There was something really compelling about Adam Sandler's raw emotion that made me really feel for him and his pain. Throughout the movie you're rooting for him to overcome his adversity and you get drawn into to wanting Alan to figure out the best way to help him. This is one movie that is worth your time and after it go have think about your life and who really matters to you.

the tear

i weep and weep a tear
which will not fall
no matter how much i weep

its pang in me
is like the birth of an icicle.

colder and colder, the earth
curves on my eyelid,
the northern ice-cap keeps rising.

o, my arctic eyelid.

- marin sorescu

I went to see the One-man Star Wars Trilogy show and it was terrific. Ever since I was a young geek I was in love with Star Wars. I was even a member of the star wars club and for a period of time all my school conversations revolved around Star Wars. Charles Ross goes through the entire trilogy in an hour and it's a wild ride. He completely hits the nuances of the series and fans will be able to appreciate his attention to detail. He's been doing the show for years but his energy is incredible. I loved his ability to weave in his own commentary into the stories. The crowd was laughing all the way through, lots of clapping and it was great to about around other fans of the trilogy. There was an incredible mix of young , old and people all over the socio-economic spectrum. It's funny how such a cheesy set of movies could bind so many disparate people.

The show is playing till the 11th at the Post Street Theater. 

don't ask me for that love again

that which then was ours, my love,
don't as me for that love again.
the world then was gold, burnished with light-
and only because of you. that's what i had believed.
how could one weep for sorrows other than yours?
how could one have any sorrow but the one you gave?
so what were these protests, these rumors of injustice?
a glimpse of your face was evidence of springtime.
the sky, wherever i looked, was nothing but your eyes.
if you'd fall into my arms, fate would be helpless.
all this i'd thought, all this i'd believed.
but there were other sorrows, comforts other than love.
the rich had cast their spell on history:
dark centuries had been embroidered on brocades and silks.
bitter threads began to unravel before me
as i went into alleys and in open markets
saw bodies plastered with ash,bathed in blood.
i saw them sold and bought, again and again.
this too deserves attention. i can't help but look back
when i return from those alleys-what should one do?
and you still are so ravishing- what should i do?
there are other sorrows in this world,
comforts other than love.
don't ask me, my love, for that love again.

- faiz ahemd faiz
 
A weekend of comedy for me. I've been looking forward to the Reno 911: Miami movie and it didn't disappoint. It's a movie where you can just go and laugh your arse off. It helps to have seen the series but you can be a virgin and still enjoy it. They managed to kick it up a notch with the subject matter that they couldn't get away with on TV. My favorite character is Terry I just love the stories he comes up with and he magically shows up in Miami with the rest of the crew. For those of you who don't know, Terry is a male prostitute who is always on roller skates. He's always up to no good but concocts these fantastic stories to explain why he's doing what he's doing. The movie isn't scoring so well under reviews but if you're the sort of person that liked Old School, Wedding Crashers or Dodgeball you're going to love it. Two snaps and a twist for it.

Gray Matters is another comedy that isn't doing so well at the box office. I saw the trailer for it while watching another movie and I thought it'd be interesting. Despite the reviews I actually enjoyed it. My expectations were set pretty low given that the last romantic comedy I saw Music and Lyrics didn't really do anything for me even though I wanted to like it. The story revolves around the complications where a brother and sister end up liking the same girl. When you know that's the basic premise of the movie you should automatically suspend any belief that you are going view a philasophical meditation on the heteronormative world we live in. Once we get past that mental barrier we're free to enjoy the movie. I thought the movie was exceptionally cute. What it underscores is the pain and madness that unrequited love can bring and the added complication of not quite understanding your own sexuality. The movie is not 100% even in terms of comedy but it's funny and touching in some scenes. I was never a Heather Graham fan but she did a really great job of playing someone who is completely neurotic and Bridget Moynahan is stunning. If you're a romantic at heart I think it's worth seeing and it might even be a date movie (ok, now you know I always go to movies alone :P).

distance

now that all your distance surrounds me
i stand unarmed inside a lone evening

the honey is fragrant on the table
and there is thunder in the valley,
much anxiety between the one and the other

i am frequented space
deserted by your sun.

come. ask me where
shout solitude at me

and this sky tainted with dismay
with mountain lights
has learned me by heart forever

- Andrea Zanzotto

The weather was rather gloomy in San Francisco on Sunday so I decided to visit the Asian Art Museum. They happened to have an exhibit of art from the Mewar Kingdom of India which looked kinda interesting. I love looking at detailed artwork , it's a form of meditation for me. The great thing about the art on display was that it was intricately detailed so you had to get really close to it to really see what was going on. Most of the images are of daily life with the ruling king being the focus. I like looking beyond the focus at all the other details. I think this is what really makes an artist. People usually only see the obvious it's the details that are beautiful to me. In one picture there is a landscape with the king's palace in the front and other villages in the back. The closer you get, the deeper the image is as you see  the details of elephants and people in the distance, each with it's own story. It's like seeing a beautiful face from a distance that compels you to get closer and when you're close enough it's the nuances of the face, the sparkle in the eye or the way a few strands of hair lightly caress the face that ends up fascinating you.

I had some time to kill before I was going to see Gray Matters so I ran to check out the third floor. It has to be my favorite part of the museum. It contains a mix of indian, tibetan and chinese art. It was around noon so the floor was practically empty which is great for me. I often imagine how beautiful it would be to be there at night alone. I remember walking into the hall where most of the Buddha statues are  and it was totally empty. It's nice to just wander around without having to compete with other people for space around a particular piece. Museums are best enjoyed quietly. I find it humorous how many people are suddenly experts in art and spew forth half-truths about the culture where the art came from. A tourist mentality to culture is a crime since like art you're seeing the obvious but it's not the obvious that is the most interesting part, always think about the details.

Given we're having so much rain in SF it might be worth your time to check out the asian art museum.

Perfume: The Story of a Murderer

Patrick Suskind

I finished Perfume on the weekend and was spellbound by it. Like all the books I really love I read them very slowly so I can absorb each word and ponder the scene in detail. The story revolves around Jean-Baptiste Grenouille who is born without a scent but has a hypersensitive sense of smell. He is born unwanted and unloved and grows up with a great deal of trauma. His outward appearance is reflects his inner darkness. He does not feel and lives in his own world of smell where he is king. His obsession with smell leads him to murder and most of the story is about journey from a ghost where he is unnoticed to a spectacle. Ultimately this is a story of an outcast who creates his own world and lives by his own rules. He knows enough to manipulate others into getting what he needs and in that he is the perfect sociopath. The notion that he lacks any odor seems to be more of a metaphor that he is unable to truly understand his own nature and therefore can never be at peace with himself. Even when he is lost in the world of smell he is brought back to earth by the face he will never smell himself. I don't want to give away too many details but it's a good read and perfect for the great weather we're having in San Francisco.